Doctor Who & Animal Crossing

You all are probably wondering why I haven't been posting a lot lately.

It's not because I've been busy. (I haven't been. I sit around all day on the internet or at work, bored out of my mind.)

It's not because I've found more productive things to do. (The one corner of my room is still messy as all get-out, and I haven't found "time" to clean it yet.)

It's not because I've figured out what I want to do with my life. (Wait - I have to decide?!)

No, there are two little explanations as to why I've been neglecting my blog:

Doctor Who & Animal Crossing.

I mean, I'm sorry, but I think I might be a bit obsessed.

I stay up until 3:00 or 4:00 a.m., watching Doctor Who every night. (I'm trying to finish the seasons before the Fiftieth Anniversary in November, you see.) I'm exhausted come the next morning, but it's worth it.

I'm absolutely in love with David Tennant - he's a brilliantly fantastic actor, and the world would be a much poorer place without him. (Plus, shipping Ten & Rose just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.)

Doctor Who lets me get away from the real world for a few hours. It chases away the dreams of Charlie so that I can actually sleep. 

I'm waiting for a mad man in a blue box to come and rescue me from my sad little life. I've become obsessed. I am officially a Whovian. And I am not in the least bit sorry.

As for Animal Crossing, I spend more time running around on there than I do running around the real world. (Not that I do a lot of running, that is. I don't run. Ugh. Probably haven't actually run since last October, when I ran from the auditorium to my dorm room to catch up on the Vice Presidential Debate.)

I'm trying to make my town perfect. At the moment, it is perfect; I just have to have it perfect for fourteen more days so that I can get the Golden Watering Can. (Woo!) I'm Mayor Mira of Mysidia, you see, and I'm attempting to get my town in beautiful condition.

The current Public Works Project? Remodeling the Town Hall into a Zen Town Hall. It's going to be absolutely fantastic. Then I'm going to work on my room. (I'm looking for Rococo Furniture for my basement - if you have any, please contact me at once!)

***

Anyways.

I'm spending all my time in my little fantasy worlds. I'm thinking about David Tennant and how much time I'm going to spend on Tortimer's Isle in Animal Crossing instead of sleeping. I'm getting maybe five hours of sleep a night, if that, and I'm terrified of thinking during the day. If I think, I'll start daydreaming about Charlie.

I've got something wrong with me.

And it's probably very serious.

I move into my dorm again on Saturday. I'm going to have a new room mate, one that doesn't know my past (and I'm never going to tell her about Charlie, not if I can help it). I don't want to have a complete nervous breakdown in front of her. They seem to happen in the shower, so I really need to keep myself together. I don't know if I'm going to be able to do it. It's going to be really, really difficult. 

The fact that the world is moving on and I'm not is something that I just can't tolerate. It's been a week since my nineteenth birthday. It's been six days since Charlie called and talked to me for maybe three minutes. Probably more like two. He said he'd call back, but he hasn't.

My life is falling apart. I'm letting myself fall apart. And I don't know what to do.

So I'm sorry, everyone. I'm sorry I haven't been posting. I haven't felt like posting. I don't want to post misery and depression, but that's all that's been in my life lately. Maybe once I start back to college, I'll have different stories to tell: stories of the people that I saw on campus, or what I did with my life that week. (Although I doubt that.)

I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.